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mamahood

I've got Love Like an Ocean | A Denver Adoption Story

This is a pretty personal blog; I love sharing my families that I work with and am looking forward ( A LOT) to sharing my two newborn sessions next week. I had an enormous day yesterday and I really want to share it. 

 

My son was finalized yesterday; he became officially, irrevocably ours. We have had him in our care since the first moment he came into this world; I want to take a minute and share pieces of the story of his birth because its beautiful and because now, it is our story forever as well.

We have an extremely open adoption; we are very close to our sons birth family. We didn't know them before we began this journey and when we met them, we loved them right away. I'm not going to share their details, because those belong to them. It's enough to say that they are both loving, strong and beautiful people and they made a huge sacrifice in order to do what they felt was best. We cannot ever express how we feel about them with words. 


When our son came into the world it was fast and we were stunned; I cut his cord feeling like it wasn't even real. It felt like a crazy dream and when I held him I just could not believe my eyes or my arms. This little tiny human was here! IN my arms! Perfect and new! Then his birthfather came over to me and put his arms around us and whispered in my ear " you deserve this, you are going to be a great mother". This is a moment that transcends all moments of my life. I will tell my son about it when he is older and I will forever remember it. My son's birthfather's selflessness and open heart in that moment was truly exceptional. 

We spent the night with our birth family, together just wondering at what had happened. It had been such a whirlwind of a birth, we all were just slightly shell shocked. It was a bubble, just the four of us knew he was here and we kept it that way until morning.

Our son was struggling to get amniotic fluid out of his lungs, so we spent the entire night holding him upright and just staring; caught between elation and terror.  I cannot truly explain all the feelings of adoption to anyone who has not gone through it. Suffice to say, it is a maelstrom, it is everything. You feel as though your feelings are on the outside of you and at the same time completely filling you up to the very limit.  Adoption is an act of love so great that it is almost impossible for your brain to process it. ( this is in our case, obviously all adoptions are different and ours was fortunately full of love) 

Over the last 7 months our lives have changed in almost every way. Having a child, raising him the best we can knowing we are making mistakes but hoping they are small ones is a joy and a wonder to me.  We have remained close with the birth family because we love them. They gave our child life and gave us parenthood. They are amazing humans who are working hard and making their lives into what they want them to be. 

 

Yesterday afternoon, in a small courtroom in Boulder, we stood in front of a judge with family and friends at our backs and heard our son be officially sworn in as ours. My heart blew up. 

 

He is a treasure to us, our family and friends who came to witness this huge moment are also a treasure to us. They stood up with us, in that moment full of all of our hope and fear; their presence was a comfort and a promise to our son.

 

We have had a long standing policy around showing images of my son's face on the internet and that isn't going to change but I sure am going to share some pictures of him here because he's our now and I truly do have love like an ocean in my soul. 

Two Weeks till baby | denver Lifestyle Maternity Photography

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Two Weeks till baby | denver Lifestyle Maternity Photography

Before I even get into talking about this session, let me just put it out there that this session made me truly, deeply realize how much I absolutely love doing maternity work. It is just the pinnacle to me. I love the anticipation of a new life, i love the glow and joy of a new mama, i love the intense beauty of motherhood. Maybe I'm just a huge softy (maybe???) but maternity work is my hearts work.  

Now, let's just talk about how stunning this mama is!! Kristen volunteered for a model call I put out a few weeks back. I really was struggling with how to pick the 3 ladies for the model call and then I read an article about going with your heart when accepting clients and I knew it was going to be Kristen.  She is just everything you love in a person; sweet, open, warm and welcoming.  

 

We kicked off the shoot with a few hours of girly time; hair and make up and a stylist to get the perfect outfits and accessories for Kristen. Then, with Kristen's mom's help we got down to work and made some portraits of this special time in a mother's life.

The final set of images reflects not just how beautiful Kristen is ( inside and out) but also, i think, what kind of mother she will be( already is); soft, caring, gentle, joyful and loving .

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3 is the magic number | Denver Lifestyle Family Photography

I have been so eager to share the other contest winner's mini!! This family was just so, SO sweet!

I have been listening to a lot of kids music, thanks to my son, and a school house rock song really seems to fit this family:

 

"Three is a magic number. Yes it is, it's a magic number. Somewhere in the ancient, mystic trinity You get three as a magic number. The past and the present and the future, Faith and hope and charity, The heart and the brain and the body Give you three. That's a magic number.

 

A man and a woman had a little baby. Yes, they did. They had three in the family. That's a magic number."

 

Mom opened the door when I knocked with little Lincoln on her hip.  Lincoln just took one look at me and literally fell, open-armed into mine  I was in love. 

 

The whole experience was just so tender; mom and dad clearly have such a bond with their daughter and each other that it was palpable. The images just radiate with their love and I actually had to hold back tears while editing this set. 

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Sometimes people are nervous about being photographed; they've had bad experiences or they are just private people. I think this session is a perfect example of why you can trust your photographer and trust that the love you feel will be captured.

 

What an absolute treasure of a session!!

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